Fuck Amazon and as for Amazon S3 “simple storage” WHAT A JOKE.

About 6 years ago I added a digital download to Amazon Prime. It still makes between £20 and £50 a month. A few weeks ago I decide I will add a few more titles to Amazon. With YouTube turning in to a propaganda machine of government friendly information and lame American chat show clips I decide to invest more time in to Amazon. WHAT A MISTAKE AND A HUGE WASTE OF TIME.

I start by attempting to upload to Amazon video https://videocentral.amazon.com

Failed…. Other peoples YouTube videos uploaded fine (I tried) mine do not! I keep seeing the error Try again later.

I convert the files into Slightly different types of MP4s and use an encoder called H.624 as Amazon recommend, still the same problem.

I take the problem to Amazon’s (super polite but super useless) support. They recommend I add the files to another Amazon service called S3. Amazon call this service “simple storage.”

This is where the fun starts. Amazon S3 console is THE WORST online experience I have ever had. It is about as user friendly as fresh nettles would be a toilet paper substitute. After two weeks of fucking around reading, watching videos and attempting to add videos I still have NO IDEA what the fuck is happening.

Everything I do on S3 leads to a problem. I begin uploading files, after an hour the the upload stops, no reason given just the word error.   

I start again after an hour I am automatically signed out. I sign in and start again. This time I have success, wow I’m nearly done I think to myself. WRONG.

I named the file wrong (my fault I should have read more carefully) not a problem I will just rename it. WRONG. To rename the files I have to re-upload it. The files is about 3 gb it takes a while.

I rename the file on the hard drive and re-upload it, done? I wish.

More problems. Now I see something the file exceeds the limit for bigger files use API with a click here for more information. I follow the link only to be taken to a MASSIVE page of nonsense. It might as well be written in Chinese.  Take a look @ https://docs.aws.amazon.com/AmazonS3/latest/API/RESTObjectSELECTContent.html

I try to read and understand it but WTF, I’m a video maker not a FUCKING COMPUTER programmer. Why is this so FUCKING complicated? Why can’t I just add to Amazon video direct like people on YouTube are?

I think Amazon are deliberately keeping me off their platform. S3 is useless AVOID AT ALL COSTS. But Amazon video direct is a simple site to use yet every time I upload my own work to it the upload fails.

The Amazon support team are about as helpful as a lump on your balls. Why not just tell the truth? We don’t want your shit on here? I want compensation for the 2 weeks of bullshit I have wasted trying to sort this out.

Amazon is censored.

If you are here for advice on how to use Amazon S3 my advice is don’t bother. Its useless.